Friday, June 20, 2008

BoOang

(Evil smile..)

I'm not a pet person. I think pets are cute and I'd be willing to watch over it for utmost 5 minutes.
But I definitely do not want to "be a companion of" one. I strongly feel that people with pets are screwed.
I'd worry too much if I didn't use enough pet shampoo or whether I should get the milk flavored chew toy and not the multivitamin bone thing.
Worrying does not suit me.
I came home a few weeks ago. And something fluffy jumped me. It immediately sniffed my butt, slobbered on my feet, and nibbled on my boobs. Shit. My sister got a pet dog.
My room is occupied by my sister so we had to share the room whenever I visited home. It also meant waking up with an awesome view of Boo's butt.
I slept for 2 hours and sneezed for 6 hours. My slippers were swimming in what I hoped was water in the middle of the living room.
I learned a lot of stuff too. Dogs can snore. He is 98% genetically identical to skunks. Their farts should be the 8th wonder of the world.
If you chase him, you will chase him forever. Your slippers will never look the same again. Looking for your slipper would equal Indiana Jones' treasure hunts or whatever Indiana is running around for.
70% of the pictures taken will be fluffy blurs. If he hates you, he will hide under the sink, ignore you when you call him and wait there for 3 hours until you go, carry him out and comfort him.
When there's a lightning storm, you will find him behind the refrigerator. If he is bored, he will eat your hair. If he is happy, he will eat your hair. If you dress up to go out, he will tug on your pants until you're half naked. He will also chew your shoes and hide it behind the washing machine.
He will chomp your cellphone when it rings. He will also bring stuff inside your house that you thought were extinct.
Yep. I'm definitely screwed. Boo (short for "boang" - "Crazy")

(Notice the sofa? Yeah.. I didn't think dog saliva could do that either. Don't bother with sofa comfyness. It does not exist.)

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